Occupant E has joined the traffic on my side of the corridor and throws me a smile before she continues to scream into her phone “naa dhaa appave sonnenla” (“I told you that already”). More occupants and many more ringtones blaring out to them. This is an every night routine. It’s clear proof that the world is small and connected. Very well. Its fun watching these people. They walk, strut, run, jog and even jump over piles of footwear along the corridor, so intent on their conversations, avoiding banging into people by sheer instinct! I said its fun observing because these people are diverse – in language, slang, emotions and magnanimity with words.

Proceeding along the corridor, I can gauge the gist of the talk just by looking at the faces – an open smile: “1 more week mom, I’ll be home!”. A sly smile – “Hah! I found out about your BF!”. Blushes – “Heyyyy! Am I that beautiful?”. Contorted sad face – “Why should you end it? Give me one reason!” (Poor thing.. Lost love). Furious – “That git! And they call him a lecturer!”. There are many more I could make a dictionary of. You’ll find these people everywhere when it is phone time – leaning on the door, ferreting in the corridor, exercising in their rooms, staring out the window, in a silent spot of the darkest corner of the staircase (Shhh.. Romancing.. DND), sitting on the stairs (sometimes like a Golu display, one on each stair) and I know of one who even sat on top of a Western loo closet sick of not getting privacy!

These souls talk to a variety of people – mom, dad, brother, sister, cousin, friend, fiancé, ex-s, lover, customer care(!), talk about an enormous range of topics (my one page vow stops me from listing out) and in a wide range of languages! Sound waves move from “Solluda” to “Yep.. That’s right” to “Nyan paranyittillo ahdi” to “pichakara dog e” (kids don’t read this – unclassified vernacular ) to “@##$%^$%$#!#^$^%I&^*&” (Er.. That was high speed Telugu and Kannada. I lack decrypting grey cells! ) to “Acha, baadh meh baath kartha hoon” (“Talk to you later”. Wont hang up in less than a solid hour after this!).

The decibel level would start with a beep and a ring, proceed to a babble of voices, to an unintelligible chaos, to perfect ‘all hell breaks loose’ and go down in steps as one by one they disconnect, stop talking, stop walking (and running and jumping and exercising) and retire to their rooms; content with sharing what they wanted to. After all that’s what sets us humans apart as social animals, isn’t it? We talk. We love to! Oh and by the way, those isolated occupants in the dark corners.. Shhh, still talking! I’m done writing. Got to study and then “Yeh ishq hai.. Baite bitaae” Oh! That’s my mobile ringing…excuse me. “Hello! Ya ya.. Tell me..”

Photo courtesy: =thundermistress. Thanks!

I wonder if it’s some kind of electrostatic attraction between my pen and my brain because when am in the groove it goes at top speed like a seismograph sensing a powerful earthquake! I don’t write articles everyday in spite of having a lot of things to write about (that explains why my diary is swollen to 10 times its size with just hints I jot down daily!!) but when I do feel a work coming on it’s a few minutes of rapid and serious writing and bingo – I’ve exhausted a bunch of papers! I’ve always felt my mind and heart working as one when I write. Like they seem to know what exactly wants to be put into words. That’s hard to control. I’m a person who gives heart and soul to anything I do and writing definitely tops my list.

People who have read my works tell me they are good but my mom always points out with a sigh that they are obviously too lengthy to be read by anyone without forcing them into it! Pras would agree vehemently.. Every time I mail him an article he has a lot of tweaking to do with the font size and the layout to make sure it doesn’t run off the page! My own blog suffers the same plight.

I love expressing myself and thanks to that they always turn out to be magnanimous. That’s my style of writing – replete with sarcasm, humour, confusion, anger and what not. I reasoned with myself that all those things needed pages to explain (couldn’t convince  myself to write short) but then I found one guy who did exactly that and still kept his articles to half a page! Sudhish Kamat and his movie reviews in The Hindu! Each one is a treat for anyone with good humour! That’s when I started thinking if someone else could do it, I could do it too! And I started reading blogs belonging to my friends. It turned out that ‘someone’ was ‘everyone’ apart from me! It was around that time our own Pras woke up from his intellectual slumber and started filling IK with his creative write-ups (sick of running behind us – the others who promised to contribute!). They were brilliant! Short and sweet, they were a perfect expression of emotions spot on. I realized that was the secret. To write, write and write.. Whenever you feel like it. That way what you want to say comes out at the right time and you don’t have to wait for it to accumulate sufficiently and end up writing XL-sized articles! One tiny reflection at a time brings about the same reaction and increases your article database too. Pras, now I know your secret har har! So that’s it. I’ve decided to try and write concise stuff. This should be a start!

This doesn’t mean the lengthy ones won’t happen but I’ll reserve them for once-in-a-while. Wish me luck guys!

P.S: This one didn’t go over a page! Yay me!

I felt very happy and thrilled for my buddies who had found success in love – a lot of them were the oh-I’m-not-the-falling-in-love type . Love is by far the second most beautiful feeling in the world (I rate a mother bearing a child first ). The way someone who is not your blood understands you and accepts you for what you are, can leave you feeling amazed in only two kinds of bonds – friendship and love!

All those moments of feeling special, holding hands, stealing a quick glance, the shy smiles, and the whole new shades of brightness that shows up on the face lighting up the eyes.. A treat to watch in anyone smitten by love!

Flip 180° and I could see the brave faces that my love-slain friends were trying to put up. All those things that I mentioned for love were running through their minds too but instead of making them smile it made them cry as they crumbled under the pain of memories they carried. True. Love hurts like nothing else on earth when lost. Very true.

They say love is blind and I agree – blind enough for people to fall for someone who is not the right match and blind still to fall out with some one who is a potential soul mate!

As much as falling out with a person hurts, it is not the end of the world. I was thinking of this as I lent out my shoulder to the troubled souls to cry on. A million questions were running through my head. My friends are genuine and gentle people. Fun to be with and ready to do anything to get a buddy out of trouble. Then how did they fail in the game of love? How could someone not see the sincerity behind their feelings? Or did they miscalculate the feeling and maybe it was just Cupid’s 3rd generation cousin getting some arrow practice? What about me? I too am one of those stay-away-from-love types. Will I crash and burn too?

As I got thinking about it, I remembered Morgan Freeman in the movie Evan Almighty. He says “When you ask God for something, He does not give it to you wrapped in a parcel. He gives you opportunities to get it”. And that struck me as true. Especially with relationships. Maybe that’s what all this is about. It isn’t something to be counted as a loss. It is to show how much love someone is capable of.. To show that a person isn’t afraid of commitment. To make them appreciate themselves so that when true love comes along they could grab it with their heart open!

Loving someone is not about turning into a villain or a bearded-bard if they don’t love you back. It’s about feeling happy for them and caring for them exactly the way you did before you knew how they felt, because love is not something to be conquered or to fret about if lost. It is to give and give unconditionally! And those of you who have decided to breakup.. Do it gently.. Everyone deserves respect and love.. More so the person who chose to love you!

For those buddies of mine who lost an early wicket in love, cry as much you want to, for the times you believe to be lost. But when you are done, feel happy for those precious moments that you bagged with your loved one.. As much in the past they may be.. They are still yours to keep. Make new memories with your life. My suggestion would be – don’t be afraid to fall in love. But don’t be afraid of falling out either!

As for me I hope I don’t have to endure Cupid’s cousin and wish that the master marksman would find my knight in shining armour for me. But even if I have to, I would know that its not the end. I get to love someone and I would do that no matter what! At least they can be sure of one person’s love always! There are two thoughts I’d like to quote. One from the Tamil movie Sillunu Oru Kaadhal where Bhoomika says “If you love something and find that some one else could take better care of it, how could you not let it go?” and an anonymous reflection – “If you love someone and they don’t reciprocate, wait for it grow in their heart.. If it doesn’t be content that it grew in yours”!

As hard as it may seem to accept these matters of the heart, they are true, right and special. To all those in love, wish you all the luck in the world. And to all those with a huge sigh.. Hang in there fellas! Cupid’s hitting town any moment now! Cheers!

Image courtesy: ~darkbutterfly6. Thanks!

Have you ever talked to yourself? In front of a mirror? Have you listened to the wonderful things you felt about yourself? Have you realized how good a friend you can be to yourself? You were gifted with a best friend right from the moment you came into this world. A friend so true and so sincere that only the worst moments of your life uncovers him/her. Let me make it a him for reference. This friend I call ‘the mind’ – you call him whatever you want. Do understand – the brain is what thinks; the mind is what analyses and reasons. This best friend of mine and yours too deep inside will laugh and cry with you – truly. No amount of happiness or sorrow is déjà vu to him because what matters to him ultimately is you and you alone. There are no other commitments for him and the sole purpose of this friend is to see you through the complex maze of life as lightly and as successfully as possible. Hey! Am not getting preachy. This friend is flexible. Make him be any form you like – a cuddly bunny, your idol, a nice face you like – anything! Name it and he’ll cater to you, as you like. Now isn’t this what Calvin is doing with Hobbes? This friend is also as practical as you are. He’ll giggle with you, comment on your dress, that boring lecture, that cute guy/girl – anything. Just for you. And he expects nothing from you. Just be happy and ‘live’ life he would say. He’s protective, loyal, trustworthy and most of all completely secretive and extremely comforting. He fills that big void in your life. This would happen naturally when you are 60. Then you realize, “Aah! I had him in here”. He was always there. I just want to tell you, you can enjoy this friendship right now. Throughout your life. The more you get to him, the more he’ll make your life real. He’ll not climb the dias and start with “my dear comrades..”, but you will realize the truth of life as suddenly and yet as beautifully as a dewdrop on a lotus leaf. He’ll be the first one to hug you when you win, to tell you that you are gorgeous, to shed tears for you and feel heavy when you are sad, to shake you up and comfort you saying “It’ll be alright, don’t give up”, to tell you how it hurts when you hurt someone. He will tell none else. Forgiving is his USP.

I cant show him to you. Nor can I explain what exactly he means to me, but I have given you a sample. I’m glad I found him and he’s happy to have stepped in early. It feels heavenly listening to him and I miss nothing and I don’t feel lonely anymore. I still have my group of friends but with my best friend, I appreciate them better and they love me more. I’m being moulded by a trusted friend. What more could one ask for? I’m happy that I am in safe hands and surprised to know that it was inside me. Spiritually they call him ‘conscience’. Nah! I just call him my best buddy!

We both became friends instantly. Something about him struck me ‘natural’. When with him u wouldn’t run around for breath. I could see him at his place from my window and he was always an early riser. His scented early morning greeting was something that I never missed. He wasn’t that active on the ground so when I would run abt and play he would just sit back and enjoy. When I did well he would applaud and when I goofed up and turned an embarrassed face at him he would chuckle and let it pass!

I’ve always found him comforting. I used to sit with him when I prepared for my exams and he would maintain a tart silence. The ambience always made me feel intelligent. When I needed to relax he would become light hearted and we would chat for sometime. I always felt he was closer to God than me. So I would request him to pray for me and shuttle out for my exams. He’s been there for me every moment. When I cried he would surround me with his love and I would get pacified instantly. When I laughed he would join me and that always shook him up completely! There would be tears of joy like dew drops in his eyes. I used 2 wonder if the happiness was originally mine.

I’ve moved out of the quarters now but he’s still there. He’s quite attached to that place. He still loves me and whenever I go over he’ll be the first one to welcome me. And the ‘ol story would begin again! There were numerous times when we’ve been together and I’ve felt the peace in him flow through to me. Not to worry. He’ll be there as long as I’m here. He’s sure to be around for another hundred years.. Yeah.. What?.. Uh oh! Well.. You must be wondering.. Um.. My best buddy is a eucalyptus tree!! Honestly! What were u expecting???!